. . .  S T A T U S

Mood : ok-ok

I can't sleep. I am thinking lots of things. If you were to ask me what are they, I can't answer. Those thoughts are similar to uncountable cells in my body, rambling up and down in my tiny brain. To be more specific, they are like the gas participles vibrating in a container in no specific direction. Everything is trapped up and I have no clue at all. I have no idea what my solution is, yet I couldn't stop thinking about them.

I realized many things aren't happening the way I wanted them to. That upsets me pretty much and causes me to feel unhappy. I couldn't help it. Things are happening so drastically, unexpectedly and unpleasantly to be accepted to be truth. I really don't like how the way most things are right now. It's just like, sitting in a train which travels in an opposite direction from where you sit. It's just annoying.

I wonder if I have insomnia. I couldn't sleep well recently. I think too much. Too much. Everything under the sun will be one of my thoughts. My living lifestyle is not healthy at all. I am not sleeping at the right time and I have bad emotions most of the times. I wonder how long can my body take this. It's very bad yet I couldn't help it.

Love is one of the most sickening problems of all problems in this world besides family, studies and financial. I have a strange feeling. I love him very much but at the same time, I feel that our distance is far apart. It is indescribable and I don't think I can make anybody to understand this feeling. How I wish we can build up a bridge of mutual understanding, then we wouldn't have to quarrel so often.

Love versus obstacles. I need to face lots of obstacles in my relationship. When will they end? = (